WORLD RULES

 Ignore the Gift Police

Whether or not he gets it right, just say, “thank you”.

 

Long considered a fun holiday for expressing affection, Valentine’s Day has fallen into the clutches of the dreaded “gift police”.  They are telling men and women that only certain types of expressions of love are acceptable on this holiday.  Others are definitely unacceptable.  Men seem to be the targets of these self-appointed arbiters of appropriateness.  Granted, many men are clueless when it comes to gift giving.  Most of them did not grow up shopping.  And, some men are actually careless and insensitive.

 

My concern is that Christian women not follow the women of the world by condemning their men for the gifts they give.  If your husband brings a gift, he should not be afraid that you will be unhappy because he chose something the “gift police” have labeled “unromantic”.  Sometimes a man’s only clue as to what to buy comes from the wishes you express in your daily life.  If you have mentioned on several occasions that you need a new vacuum cleaner, he may think that is the best gift for the occasion.  It will last a lot longer than roses, and be more appreciated in the long run.  “Romantic” gifts sometimes threaten an already ailing budget, increasing stress for both of you in the weeks to come. 

 

Often the best gifts cost very little.  Would a gift measured in carats ever replace having your husband take the children out for an afternoon so that you can rest or visit a friend?  Would it replace having him hold you when you are discouraged?  Would it work for you if you received the sparkles and then were neglected for the next eleven months? Let us be sure that a spirit of ingratitude doesn’t threaten the peace we strive for in our hearts and homes.  If you get no gift at all, be thankful to God and to your husband that the lights came on when you flicked the switch and the house was warm when you woke up.

 

Don’t misunderstand me.  If I were writing to men, I would tell them to try to give the most beautiful, sensitive, romantic love offering they can find (and afford).  But, I am writing to Christian women.   Oppose the pressures of the world’s standards as you strive to live a life pleasing to God.  Whether or not he gets it right, just say “thank you”.

GOD'S PROVISION I

Our Example

Teasing and ridicule are rampant in our society.  Finding that one thing about a person over which he has no control and bashing him with it has become our national pastime.  Previously the province of schoolyard torturers, it has been raised to high art, victimizing those from high to low, who dare to show their failings.  Laughing at the misfortunes of others has become a favorite form of entertainment, perfected by Seinfeld-like sitcoms and reality TV.  One would only hope that we (writer and readers of this journal) are not perpetrators of this destructive practice.  But we are certainly witnesses, and possibly victims of this viciousness cloaked in humor.

 

Yesterday I talked to my grandson about his last bout with aggressive teasing at school.  “Did you pray,” I asked him.  When he said he had not prayed he seemed surprised at his own answer.  I apologized to him for my oversight.  Although his mom and I prayed for him and with him, I had never taught him to pray for himself, cry out to God at the time of the abuse.  And yet, I recall as a child silently seeking God when I found myself in trouble with bullies.  I discovered this defensive action on my own.  I also credit it for the relatively few emotional scars I seem to carry from these events. I shared these thoughts with my grandson:

 

1.  These are the things that are common to man.  Though it is personal and painful, your situation is not unique.  This is how a sinful society conducts itself.

2.  Satan uses it.  He convinces you that you are a victim.  From there he proceeds to raise up in you feelings of fear, helplessness, resentment, and revenge.  These are the feelings that build, layer on layer, the scars you carry with you into the future.

3.  God allows it.  God has a plan to strengthen you to withstand the foolishness of others.  He wants you to be forgiving and compassionate, even toward your tormentors.  But, he knows you can’t.  Not on your own, anyway.  (This is where the plan comes together!)

4.  So, Pray!  Cry out in your weakness to the one true Helper.  As you pray and God responds to your prayer you acknowledge that nothing is impossible for Him.  It is at these times that he loves you most.  You are learning to depend on Him and not on your own strength or understanding.  He will give you wisdom, protection, and instruction for the situation at hand.  You may receive guidance from Him that would never have occurred to you.

5.  Christ is our example.  See 1Peter 2:21-25 “This is the kind of life you've been invited into, the kind of life Christ lived. He suffered everything that came his way so you would know that it could be done, and also know how to do it, step-by-step.
   He never did one thing wrong,
   Not once said anything amiss.
They called him every name in the book and he said nothing back. He suffered in silence, content to let God set things right. He used his servant body to carry our sins to the Cross so we could be rid of sin, free to live the right way. His wounds became your healing. You were lost sheep with no idea who you were or where you were going. Now you're named and kept for good by the Shepherd of your souls.” (the Message)

 

Being teased, hurt, and ridiculed doesn’t end at high school graduation.  Can you apply this to anything in your life today?  If not, remember it when you are called on to counsel a fellow sufferer.